Saturday, March 29, 2014


Read previous chapters before read CLICK HERE

One fine day I sat beside her in a small room next to the auditorium stage. that was thoroughly unexpected.
The whole college was quick to welcome the second day of arts.But I wasn't. Last day's programs made me so decrepit. I wanted a long deep sleep.

My second day started with a phone call from my classmate requesting us to give some laptops for the smooth operation of the program committee.I attended his call with an unpleasant face. While answering his call, I was not at all Pleased. I served him in a somewhat negative way. But he forced us to go there.I didn't have any other option than obeying him.He asked me to take my room mate with me.We both started out ready to get to college.We reached there around 8.30.I looked around. Preparations are going well.

My cellphone is calling.I just checked it.The same person again,but this time he desires something more.He called for us to connect with the program Committee.He requires us to help the program committee. We are suppose to it in a small room adjacent to the stage and avail contestants to play their musical compositions while they performing on the stage.That was little more for me actually. I wanted to see all the Programs but this guy asking me to spend my whole day in that small room for some stupid work.I couldn't accept that at any cost. But what to do. The person who asking me the help is the third year coordinator of the arts. so without saying anything back to him, I reached the room adjacent to the stage.

Only a few were there in that room. Two or three. I noticed one chair and a little table located at the far 
recess of the room.i kept my laptop over the table.My friend made a cunning move.He jumped into the single and only chair in the room and smiled at me like a winner. 'Go and find Another chair'  he told me in Thrissur slang.I saw around. not even a single person was there in the room now. I wanted a junior to give these laptops and works. but the room was empty.I felt myself becoming irritated.What ever encountered so far was not at all impressive.I had to wake up from my incomplete sleep and he asked me to sit in this horrible room for the next 6-7 hours!. I desperately wanted to get out from there. My eyes were searching for someone.

'This The table is dusty'.   My friend said himself, looks too much concern about his laptop. I looked at him. He seems happy with the current work.He was looking for something to clean the dusty surface.He asked me to pass  some paper Sheets from the nearby shelf.I took some papers and handed it to him. he arranged those papers above the dusty table and put his laptop above that.He seems gratified himself by making his laptop liberate from dusty surface.The programs haven't started yet. I decided there to wait until more people reach the room. I took one chair and found myself a seat.I began gaming on my mobile.I plumped for my head along the wall and fully focused on the game.

                        " Oh, You took my seat. where should I sit now ". 

One clear voice along with a chuckle made me look straight.In my first sight I witnessed a young woman sticking out right in front of him and demanding about the chair he is currently sitting.Ist didn't require much time for me to realize that girl.The one with whom I wanted to speak with a smile is doing the same thing in front of my friend.I don't remember what I did for the next 30 seconds.They asked him about the purpose of coming,timing etc.
After that, she turned right and gazed in my direction.She Is looking towards my way, I just tilted my head and acted like I am engaged with something else.I wanted to give her a smile. But I didn't have the courage, or my mind forced me to pretend like a tough one.I saw at her roughly. she got near to shelf. I adjusted my chair in order to get her work easier, she was searching for something. I turned back to my work, watching her out of the corner of my eye.It didn't contain even 30 minutes to understand what she is looking for.  

                                     "Have You seen some papers I kept here?" 

She asked him as she turned over in his direction.He threw back a doubt look.But I didn't have any doubt.I answered her question in my head,"Ha.i saw those papers, in fact, I know where they are too".He just raised his laptop in order to Make the papers visible to her.Now her reaction was something unexpected.

                                  " This is the list of Participants for the very first program"

she screamed.He looked at me, I just stood from my seat and readied for a foot race.He leaned closer to me and whispered something.She looked at me. "I didn't.." .I whispered.She read those papers and studied it carefully. she was seeming for any opportunity to use those papers. 

"Ah. . sorry.. actually I was...."          my friend started replying here.     "It's OK. Can you give me a paper?"      She asked by creating an artificial smile on her face.We went over our bag for papers even though we knew the zero possibility of producing a paper from our bag.She ran away and found some papers and continued her work.For the next 10-15 minutes we didn't speak to her.Not a word.Later on one hour, my friend saw the availability of plenty of volunteers in that room.

"Come.. We will go. They will take care of this... We can go".    

He stated as he pointed to some of the juniors.An hour earlier, I wanted to come out of the room. But now something has changed.I struggled to reply.                

  " How can we!. He told us to sit here better not to go, "     

  I said. His reply came immediately.

               "They don't need us.We can watch once we are free from this".          

 We started to argue with each other.finally he decided to expire and I choose the opposite alternative.'Let him go'. I thought. I shifted in his chair which was More closer to her.Nothing took place for the next few minutes. program started. she is announcing. her voice is honest, good in English too. I waited her to come and ask me something. Whenever she works over my direction I pretended as I am loving the ongoing boring program.

The clock is ticking........................................................................................... I don't remember the correct time. The moment she talked to me for the very first time. the moment I got a solution for the past 3 years of my efforts.

 "iyalde  peru entha ?".

She asked me my name in pure crystal clear Malayalam.  "Is Malayalam this much beautiful to hear?". I intended as I lifted my head to her.She is standing right in front of me.This may be the minimum 'shortest 
distance' ever happened between us.   'Bibin Thomas'. I replied.Oh my god.she is smiling at me.It was too good to feel such a situation.Obviously. The person who you wanted to talk for the past 3 years is asking you the name. of course the best of moments.I wanted to ask her something. what to ask......."your name?". I made a safe move. "Maria " she said.And so it was like a slowly accelerating vehicle.'Native place, family, studies, GPA..........'I covered nearly all the topics I could cross in first Meeting.

Lecturing to a unknown young lady is similar to performing a program on the stage.Tensions, worries, everything are only up to the stage.Once you started the first line of your song or the first step of your program, everything bothering you disappears.We hardly spoke for 30 minutes. some times she went, for announcing the names.

I went out a little later and got back within an hour.This time she was sitting on my chair,

"Fud oke adich varuva lle. ?" .

She asked me.I didn't say anything but gave her a smile.

"Do you have water with you?".

She demanded once more.This time I nodded my head with a 'no chance' expression.

 "At least they could provide some water here. Fed up with This announcement and all" she whispered.

I accepted the job of setting out some water for her. I stared around. no way. No other option than buying a 
bottle from the store..I purchased one bottle from the shop and gave her. I never behaved like this before. this is the first time I'm making out something nifty for an unknown person,i thought in my mind.She took it and sipped from it."

"how do you arrange this water ?" she asked me "i bought it from the store".i replied.

"you bought it?why " .She said with an unknown expression.I didn't say anything clearly, said something incomplete.I sat there for 30 more minutes.After that I decided to endure out. I gave my number to her and inquired her to inform me for whatever urgent demand.

After that I left the room. Unfortunately, I couldn't be there in that room anymore during the arts.We didn't see each other for a while.Only during the last times of third year, something just happened that turned to be an important fact in our friendship.

Tuesday, March 18, 2014


( read the first chapter (previous post)  before reading this,or Click Here to read )

Since all this went on in real life,not in the movie, it got a great deal of time.Approximately one year, that Is my first year of graduation. I couldn't do anything outstanding in the past one year. I wanted to talk with her but I didn't have the bravery to talk.It was time to change to the new second year hostel which is more 
minute than the old hostel.My room was on the first floor. I got one mechanical guy as my roommate.fortunaltely my adjacent room are of civil students.

From the second day itself,i commenced my spy work.i asked them about her.They agreed to help me but i didn't want her to know about me.So i requested them to keep the matter in safe.Everyday,my hobby was to ask them about her ,like 'her performance' ,native place, her approach to boys ,etc.i learnt everything they know about her,and they were so  adept at sharing their information too.

One night, they offered me her phone number and inspirited me to call her. Every boy like such things. They always relish to help in constructing these kinds of 'Bridges' in between girls and boys. My friends also did the same. But I wasn't bold enough to call her in the night. So I postponed the plan to call her, but I never 
called her.They compelled me agian .But i didn't.Then they started saying that old-famous dialogue "If I was there in your place, I would....... ". But those things were not a problem for me.i wanted to call her but I didn't.Simply didn't.But i did something incipient.

I planned to commence a facebook account,so that i can gradually get in touch with her through facebook.But the problem was, how she is going to accept my friend request without knowing me.? Especially a girl is not going to accept a Request unless it has  enough number of mutual friends or the person is familiar to her. so I was cerebrating to find a solution to fix that trouble. Finally i found a solution. it was simple. First step was to make a large number of friends.Once I carried through that job, there is a high probability to make a high number of mutual friends with her. Then in the second step, I can send her a request . At least by  examining the number of mutual friends, she may accept the request.

The plan was good. I decided to do that. I created a new account and i sat 3 hours in front of Facebook that day.I sent proximately 300 requests that day (most of them was two boys). within the next The few days I accomplished the first step. Most of them accepted my request. in an interval of 10 days I became a Facebook utilizer with around 250 friends. So the very next Saturday I took net connection and send her a request. sending request was tenser than guessing an answer on an entrance question with five options. I waited Minutes, hours for her reply. but nothing transpired that day.

Tomorrow morning I heated up earlier as I had to get to church.Just afore leaving the room, I did an expeditious check in my account and I saw one red symbol at the right top of my account which verbalizes that she has accepted that request.Two seconds I stood straight without knowing what to do further, and then I couldn't hold.
I looked around.I saw my roommate is enjoying his sleep in his bed.He was with me throughout the process.But now he is sleeping.How could he sleep without knowing his effort's result.I called him.No..No response.Called agian...Same result...No other option,I took my steel plate which i used to eat,and throw that towards his brain.Good throws.It hit where i wanted to hit.I received immediate results. I saw some unknown expression on his face as he removed his bed sheet from his face.He was looking at me without getting any conception about the perpetual incident.I told him the result,he nodded and exited back to sleep.I got back from church around 8am, i went through her profile.her photos,friend lists,etc.

I still can recall how I entered Into my classroom the next day.I arrived at the college around 8:50.Class was supposed to be at 9 am.But a few were there so far.they were sitting on the desks.I entered into the class with a 'closeup' smile and I Described everything transpired during past 2 days.They didn't asked anything but I pushed them to hear my success level.After that Incident, I practiced to take net connection so often,but I never ever noticed her as online.My intention was to get going with messaging but nothing was on my path.

As days pass by, My concerns over her decreased gradually. None of my circumstances give me a green signal.Those were the days second year students brought more freedom In the college, hence I became involved in several natural processes which draw me so busy and kept me off from her.Fun with friends, hostel life, football plays in the evenings, weekend cricket matches, it led me to another world. we became more closer with classmates, more good friends everything erase her image from my intellect. 

But for an action, there must be a reaction. I got an opportunity 14 months afterwards.I was in third year, when that takes place.
                                                                                                           ( to be contd..)

Saturday, March 15, 2014


It was an exam day I saw her. One white fair girl who was taking the air in front of me as she looks into her notebook. Her expression appeared to be so tensed. Though it was just enough to make me see her continuously.
My college life was so much memorable like any other student. I relished every ups and downs it gave me. There are some deplorable things, some good things and few best Things as well. Series Exams were nothing but a time pass for me. That particular day I came little earlier to the exam hall.Not because I was thus keen to write the exam But I dint have anything to do in my hostel, and I don't smoke to melt off the pressure of examinations. So I decided to take a walk. I got to college and simply did Something.

After looking into my exam hall number, I hit the corridor close to my exam hall. My eyes were looking for someone from my class so that I could learn something from asking them,But I didn't get anyone. So I was simply drifting around the classroom and a little after I found a seat for myself near to the steps.I saw each person coming through  the stairs.Most of them were so engaged with their studies. suddenly I saw one face that was quite good  to impress me. Thither she was, a cute, good looking White girl walking towards my direction by reading her notebook.I have seen a  lot of girls before, but this was something 'new' to spend those precious 'last Minutes before the exam' by looking at her.But after she turned over the corridor, she looked round for her classmates to substantiate  whether the room she reached is right one or not.Then she found a felicitous, 'comparatively silent' place for her and commenced reading again.

I was visually examining her closely and at the same time i wondered why i could not  study like she is doing.She hasn't tied her hair right. The cause might be the exam. While She reads the book, her short hair was hanging in her face, which earns her more pretty.

Her presence caused me perform some unwanted show off (like walking near to her, speaking aloud, pretending to be a 'cool person' who does not even hold a notebook in the exam day, etc ).My intention was to capture her attention. but she not even noticed me. Nothing great happened that day except  one more bad exam   gets added to  my list.I did what i could ,to find her after the exam.but i didn't find her.

I was guessing around her while I ambulating back to the hostel.Her tensed face made me think about her an abundance of times. The one vital information I Amassed from that exam incident was about her branch. I visually perceived some of my hostel mates Talking with her that day. So I did a guess about her branch and that was right. So I commenced Making new friends from civil department and started probing her name among my civil friends.I tried to describe her in my own words like 'small eyes','tall enough', etc., but that wasn't enough For them to identify her from 70 -80 girls of whole civil department. Of course I can't incorporate Them, every one was behind some other single targets. so no one took my request in solemn. But that was not a reason for me to quit from the mission.

I continued my works in my own ways. most of my efforts were failures. conspicuously! You can't facilely identify a girl from a college of more than 2300 students. In my case I dint have a single detail of the person I wanted to know about, Plus the label of a first year student made the things more arduous. then too, I strived even though the results were negative. I reiterate the same process in the next exam days as well,but I couldn't find her.

But trust me.our efforts comes true one day. the day was a nebulous afternoon, My friends and I were standing near to an ATM machine proximate to my college. we were hashing out about something, but I was silently thinking about the current on going class which we skipped from. one of our friend made us to skip the class because he wasn't in an earnest mood to sit in the class. initially I wasn't delighted about his decision because I had already lost some attendance because of my 'interests' in lectures. But now I have to verbalize thanks to him. because that was the second time I have seen her.

while we were talking with each other, through the gap between friends standing in front of me, I realized the girl I'm probing is getting towards our way.I don't know what she is doing here in this class time.Did she skip the class like we did.?  Whatever it may be, she is coming towards our direction. Since it was in an unexpected time ,i felt as i'm facing an elimination round of a malayalam 'reality-show'.She was in a black T-shirt and jeans which makes me consider whether she belonged to a kung-fu class or something.

i got exhilarated in front of ma fiends and they coughed purposefully when she was more closer.'MARIYA'!( name is not right one).. one of my friend said her name aloud.He recognized her name. He was likewise a 'researcher' like me,more efficient than me of course. what ever it may be, I got her name. one more step closer now I am. 'MARIYA' ...'MARIYA'..,i repeated the name again and again in my mind.
                                                                                                                          (to be contd..)

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

What AC Milan Missing This Year

Seven times champions of Europe are currently trying hard to ensure their  spot in top five of league table which is currently seems to be overly hard. They have to acquire all the remaining matches if they want to meet in Europe next season, provided others result must help Milan. Their recent performance says there next Year's Europe dreams are almost over.

They tapped out of this year's champions league as they ran out to win over Atletico Madrid last day.

There was a time when every team scared of AC Milan,  but at present the remaining matter is its name itself. If we look at their recent performance in and out of Italy, Anyone could well see that this team is not yet comparable to the team once it was. They are seriously missing something right away

Italian teams were famously known for their defensive play. but Milan's problems originate at the defense itself.They don't have a world class center back. Rami Is good, but he failed to perform consistently. The first thing Milan needs to do is to get a world class defender to their group. the number of goals they have conceded This season, says the necessity of a world class defender.considering the full back options they have,De sciglio is of course an upcoming player and right back position is safe in him,but they need someone in the other side too.Emanuelson is not bad.But Milan wants a left back who can make more prospects without leaving more spaces in the defense. a player equally good at both attack and Defense.

The second problem is in the heart itself. midfielder, they desperately need a play maker. Montolivo is capable of playing as defensive mid, but they need one more play maker To lead from the center. As per the Milan's formation they need two central midfielders. one position is safe in montolivo's hand but they need to find a better option for the Second slot. montolivo and De jong together is not effective.Their recent purchase Essien is not at all an option for that situation.So they need to buy a good play maker.One who is good at both defense and creating chances, one Who controls the game as Ture Yaya, Gerrard, Xabi Alonso doing for their team.

As per the offensive department is concerned, return of El Shaarawy will fix most of the troubles.Techniques of balo,taarabt and El Shaarawy along with the vision and Scoring skills of kaka are enough to fight against any team.

But football is all about team work, it is not necessary to win if you have good players in your squad.
Team work is what exactly lacking from Milan's game now. they need to play as a team. They need to play by holding the basics.They have to improve their passing to find More chances of goals.And they urgently need to make some chances in their squads.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Does god exist ? : : Reasons to believe the existence of God

You will get hundreds of results in search engines if you search the topic which I'm going to write here.'Should we believe in god' or 'Does God exist'. actually that is a Tricky question. the question which has 2 possible answers. Yes/No. Either a Yes or No will make you think about the opposite answer. your answer will force your own Beliefs onto others.

I have seen a lot of people who argue against the existence of god.their arguments are based on some questions like

  • Why Should I Belive In a God I Can't See

Why Should I Believe In a God, I Can't See, Because there is a lot of evidence around us that there is a power greater than ourselves and there are many facts that can Only be explained by the existence of such a power. If something is not visible, it doesn't mean that it doesn't exist. considers wind as an example. You can't see that With your eyes. but you can feel it. You can experience it. Existence of god is like that, you can't see. but you can experience.. Human has always had a belief to cling To. We Need to believe there is a force that is bigger and more powerful than us, a force that we can pray to when we are desperate and hopeless.

The Bible clearly says that it is not easy to experience God.

"since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them.  For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened." [Romans 1:19-21]

"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 14 I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.[a] I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”
[Jeremiah 29:13-14]

  • What about Evolution theory

The main weapon for atheist against the existence of god is the Evolution theory.
 Has evolution been proven? has not been. there is no such solid proof behind this Theory. On the other hand, nature of atomic theory, theory of relativity has not been proven. it may or may not be true.

 So probably your next question would be about my Belief in atomic theory or relativity theory? '.My answer is a student who studied physics ,my answer would be yes.I believe in atomic theory which Has not proved yet.But that is not a reason to  believe in evolution theory completely. Because there are hundreds of small/big not-proved theories which i don't Believe into.It is not necessary to believe all the non proved can we support evolution theory on the basis of an entirely different theory. And there are A lot of theories like big bang theory,from which we can understand the existence of god.

There are lots of reasons to believe in the existence of god.

  • The Universe itself shows the existence of god.

Consider our earth,the complexity of our planet points to  a deliberate Designer who not only created our universe, but sustains it's size is perfect for Sustain plant,animal and human life in it. If Earth were smaller, an atmosphere would be impossible, like the planet Mercury. If Earth were larger, its atmosphere Would contain free hydrogen, like Jupiter.Earth is the only known planet equipped with an atmosphere of the right mixture of gases to sustain plant, animal and human Life.

Its location in the solar system shows his excellence in creation. earth is at a perfect distance from the sun. if it were any further away from the sun we would all Freeze. Any closer and we would burn up. its location is perfectly made by an excellent creator. 

Similarly, Earth's rotation around the sun at a perfect speed makes the entire surface of the Earth to be properly warmed and cooled every day, which is mandatory to sustain Life here.

  • Is big bang theory against the existence of god ?  

My answer is No.The Bing Bang theory itself tells the existence of god.According to the big bang theory, the universe began by expanding from an infinitesimal volume With extremely high density and temperature. The universe was initially significantly smaller than even a pore of your skin. With the big bang, the fabric of space Itself began expanding like the surface of an inflating balloon –The existence of such a creation event explains a number of phenomena including the expansion of the Universe, the existence of the cosmic background radiation, and the relative proportions of various sorts of matter.

I can explain this theory in a theological way and i can say  big bang theory provides some evidence for the existence of God as well.I totally agree with The big bang Theory.but my question is  who initiated that expansion (as the theory says).in other words,something must have caused the big bang, and who else but God could have Done such a thing?  .Astronomer Hugh Ross in his book, The Creator and the Cosmos, puts the argument this way: "If the universe arose out of a big bang, it must have had a beginning. If it had a beginning, it must have a beginner." .yeah it should have a beginner.its no one other than the almighty.

  •  Consider Paranormal phenomena How do you explain the paranormal, such as people witnessing positive or negative sightings, like ghosts or angels?

  • What about DNA, 

Do you know ,every cell of our body contain detailed instructions code like a computer program. only difference is computer program is made up of ones and zeros , whereas DNA code is made up of four chemicals abbreviate as A, T, G, and C. each cell contain nearly 3 billion of these letters. and this three-billion-lettered program Telling the cell to act in a certain way. It is acting as an instruction manual. based on this, our body behaves differently in different conditions.
The question here is, who Programmed this? If there is a programmed code, there should be a person who coded those things.. who is that.? 

Looking at all these facts, one can conclude that a loving God does exist and can be known in an intimate, personal way.